It's Always Him
by Phanstarlight
Summary: Ever since John and Sherlock became a couple, suddenly every woman John meets tries to flirt with him. This leads to some rather awkward situations. Pathetic Johnlock fluff.


**Fluff on top of more fluff ahead :) Sadly I don't own any rights to Sherlock. Enjoy!**

The first person that tried was the woman on the cashier in a no-name corner shop on the edge of London. So of course, she had no idea the situation John was in, but that still didn't make it any less awkward. He had just slipped into the shop to buy a few things before going back home. His eyes scanned the shelves around him as he waited impatiently at the till as the girl scanned all his items. He tried desperately to not begin tapping his foot in annoyance. How long could it take someone to scan a couple of packets of biscuits and a box of tea bags? Finally, she handed him the bag and change and he took it without a thought and left the shop. Only once he got home and open up the bag did he realise why the girl had taken so long. Attached to the box of tea bags was a note.

 _You're really cute, wanna talk some time? ;)_

On the back of the note, there was a barely legible phone number. John's eyes widened and he quickly screwed up the paper into a ball and threw it at the bin, just as Sherlock walked out of the bedroom. John smiled over at him, still not entirely used to seeing Sherlock shuffling about in his morning daze.

"What was that?" Sherlock questioned, eyes flicking over to where the ball of paper had fallen just in front of the small bin in the corner before looking back up to a now very flustered looking John. An oddly mischievous grin formed on his face- which was rare at this time in the morning- before he launched himself towards the paper and snatched it up off the floor before John had even seen him move. Immediately, John lunged towards him and tried to grab the slip of paper off of him but Sherlock was too fast and now most definitely wide awake. He pulled the paper away from John's reach and unravelled it. John completely froze with his eyes fixed to the piece of paper but not daring to look at the other man's face. But his head soon snapped up when he heard a quiet laugh fall from Sherlock's lips.

"So, are you going to call her?" Sherlock asked teasingly. John's only answer was a deeper blush on his cheeks. Sherlock smiled to himself before walking over to him and wrapping his arms around his waist which caused John to freeze once more.

"I guess I'm not the only one who sees it" Sherlock whispered into John's ear.

"Sees what?" John asked, confused.

"Well, how did she phrase it? How 'cute' you are"

John rolled his eyes but couldn't stop the slow smile appearing on his lips.

"Now, how about we go back to bed?" Sherlock smirked slightly, pulling away from John and walking back towards the bedroom.

"Sherlock, it's almost noon" John stated, putting his hands on his hips. He managed to maintain his serious composure for about five seconds until Sherlock promptly dropped the sheet that was wrapped around him onto the floor.

"You coming?" Sherlock asked, still not turning around to face John, before slipping through the door. John could do nothing but follow him.

The second time someone tried to flirt with him was at a crime scene. A murder had occurred at a train station and the police had not even a single lead to go on. As usual, Sherlock was almost giggling with joy as he examined the body so John rolled his eyes and left him to it. He wandered aimlessly for a while before finding himself walking towards the witness of the murder- the victim's wife. She was sat on her own on one of the platform benches, quietly sobbing to herself. At least, that's what it looked like to John. As he approached her, she looked up and immediately smiled sweetly at him and sat up straight. John completely missed the fact that there wasn't a single tear on her face.

"Well hello there, who might you be?" she asked, beginning to twirl her fingers through her hair.

"I'm with the police- sort of. I'm here to help with the investigation into your husband's death. My name is John"

"Marie" she replied, elegantly holding out her hand. John ignored it and sat down next to her.

"How are you doing?" John asked, genuinely concerned.

"Much better now you're here" Marie giggled and fluttered her eyelashes.

"Is there anything you can tell me about your husband that might help us understand what happened?"

"My husband? Why would you want to talk about that good for nothing lout when we could talk about _you_?" Marie smirked, shifting her body closer to John who coughed uncomfortably and tried to move away only to find he was already right at the edge of the bench. His eyes flicked over to Sherlock who was stood at the other end of the platform, still examining the dead body.

"So you work for the police, huh? Spend your days hunting down bad boys and locking them away? How heroic!" Marie pushed herself further onto John.

"Um, well I... uh, you see- it's just" John spluttered helplessly as he became trapped between Marie's body and the wall next to the bench.

"We really should be going" a voice said from behind them and John viably relaxed.

"Sherlock" John sighed in relief. Marie's surprise had caused her to move just enough for John to escape. But just as he thought they could walk away, Sherlock glared at Marie for a few seconds before calling over Lestrade. He quickly whispered something to him and Lestrade nodded before stepping towards Marie and pulling out his handcuffs.

"Marie Sauders, you are under arrest" the detective inspector announced before beginning to read her rights to her as he pulled her away to his car.

"What was that?" John asked, frowning.

"She was quite clearly flirting with you. I couldn't have that now, could I?" Sherlock smirked, slipping his hand into John's.

"Sherlock! You got her arrested because of _that_?" John half yelled.

"Oh don't be an idiot, John. She's obviously the one who killed her husband" Sherlock replied as he started walking back home, pulling along a slightly dazed John behind him.

After that, John became a little more careful around women he didn't know. But even that couldn't help him when he and Sherlock were out for dinner together one night. It was a slightly nicer restaurant than they were used to but Sherlock had insisted- for what reason, John did not know but it was rarely wise to question Sherlock's motives. The two of them were peacefully reading over the menu when an obviously quite tipsy woman approached their table.

"Hey there, gorgeous" she slurred, looking down at John. Not quite knowing what to do, John nodded his head politely towards her before turning his attention back to the menu in his hands. But apparently, this woman would not be so easily ignored. Suddenly a hand appeared on John's thigh, making him jump in surprise. Bright red fingernails dug into his leg and after the couple of seconds it took for John to process what was happening, he shot up out of his chair. He attempted to splutter some kind of rebuttal but all he could manage was a few vague squeaks, his cheeks growing redder by the second.

"If you don't mind, I would appreciate it if you refrained yourself from touching him," Sherlock said sharply, glaring at the intoxicated woman.

"Or what? Would you really hurt an innocent woman like me?" she asked in mock offence as she fluttered her eyelashes. If she had been hoping to charm her way out of the situation, she was certain to have no luck in doing so.

"Not unless I have to, though you appear to be far from innocent" Sherlock commented coldly.

"Why do you care about what I do to your friend?" she asked, raising an eyebrow.

"That man is far more than a friend to me," Sherlock said shortly before reaching over the table, wrapping his hand around John's tie, and pulling him towards him. Their lips were crushed together and Sherlock smiled slightly to himself when he felt John's hand grip onto his shoulders for balance. If there was one thing he enjoyed more than anything, it was catching John off guard. He became so lost in the feeling of John's lips on his that he almost forgot why he had kissed him so suddenly in the first place. Slowly, his grip on John's tie released and he pulled away. He turned his head to see the woman staring at them in complete shock.

"Are we done here?" Sherlock raised an eyebrow at her questioningly. Without a word, she turned around and stormed out the restaurant. Sherlock watched her leave before sitting back down in his chair.

"What was that for?" John gasped, embarrassed at the suddenness of what had just happened.

"It worked, didn't it?"

"It certainly did!" the owner of the restaurant laughed as he walked over towards their table "She's been around here for weeks causing nothing but trouble for me and my customers. But after that little show of yours, I doubt she'll be coming back anytime soon"

The owner then clapped Sherlock on the back and declared that he would personally pay for anything Sherlock and John wanted from the menu.

"I suppose random women flirting with you does have its perks sometimes" Sherlock smiled over at John whose cheeks were still tinted pink.

"I'd rather they wouldn't" John mumbled.

"And why is that? I remember a time when you dated three women in one month" Sherlock teased.

"That was back when I was blind. Now the only person I want is you" John said so sincerely Sherlock was caught rather off guard. A waiter then approached the two of them and presented them with their meals. Without saying a word, Sherlock slipped his hand under the table and interlocked his fingers with John's. Their conversation picked up again and the evening continued without any further interruptions. But even once their meals were finished and they walked out of the restaurant, Sherlock's hand did not leave John's.

"You're being oddly affectionate tonight" John nodded towards their hands with a soft smile as they stepped into the flat.

"I guess you just have that kind of effect on me" Sherlock replied simply before slowly pulling John towards him. Their lips touched and John almost immediately relaxed into Sherlock's arms.

"I love you too, Sherlock" John whispered once he pulled away. Regardless of who or what got in their way, they would always be together. No matter what.


End file.
